Je suis fini

exp. - I’m finished – literally
This isn’t to be confused with “j’ai fini” or I’m done, as in finishing one’s meal for example. Speaking of meals, one has hunger “j’ai faim” vs. being hungry.

When one has had enough to eat, you say you have eaten well, “j’ai bien mangé” and not I am full because “je suis plein” means you are drunk. If you are however drunk it’s better to say “je suis saoul” rather than the more slang “je suis bourré,” which means sloshed, hammered, wasted, etc.

If you quite smoking, which the French are still attempting to do given that it’s harder and harder to smoke indoors any more, you actually stop smoking, “j’arrete fumer.” “J’ai quitté” means I left.

“Encore” can mean yet or again. “Je n’ai pas encore arreté de fumer,” I have not quit smoking yet (well I have actually for many years now). “J’ai encore recommencé a fumer,” I have started smoking again (again, not true in my case). “Toujours” can mean still or always. “Je fume toujours” or I still smoke, which I don’t. “Je fumerai toujours,” I will always smoke. I don’t know many people who make this proclamation since most want to quit, but just for sake of making my examples, I stuck with the smoking theme.

There is some controversy surrounding “par contre” and “en revanche,” both meaning on the other hand. I was warned that en revanche is more proper, but I have no idea why and even the person who told me never fully explained it. It has traumatized though ever since to use par contre and every time someone else does I cringe a little even if I’m unsure why.

Nothing makes people cringe as much as when I confuse my “cou,” neck, “coup,” blow or “queue,” line with “cul” which means ass. All sound frighteningly similar especially to a foreigner. The other day when I was telling a story about my husband standing in line, but pronounced it like ass, my friend corrected me and then joked that if I meant the other, she was not one to judge.

My husband has the same problem with collar and color in English, but obviously getting them mixed up isn’t quite as controversial.

The word “bague” actually means ring where the word for bag is “sac.” “Sac a main” literally translated means hand bag. “Poche” is the word for pocket, but can also refer in the southwest to plastic bag. And that brings me to a pet peeve I have with the supermarket check-out system here.

I think it must be listed somewhere in the union rules that the supermarket cashiers are not allowed to help you put your groceries in the bags. I don’t know why and nobody has had a sufficient explanation. If you’re alone, it’s especially problematic because you have to put all your things on the conveyer belt and then run through to start loading them into your bags. If you haven’t brought your own, you are at the mercy of the cashier to bring out plastic ones for you to use. And if they can’t help you put your things in the bags, I wish they would at least help open the plastic bags because it’s as if they are hermetically sealed shut and much time is lost trying to pry them apart.

By the time they are, everything has been rung up and now you have to stop packing and picking apart the bags and pay. Once that’s processed, it’s the next person’s turn and their things are now piling on top of yours. Phew or as the French say “Ouf – j’ai fini!”