Mar 24, 2009

Bises or bisous

n. – kisses
Here kissing is the common way of greeting someone, even strangers, unless it’s a particularly formal or businesslike setting. It’s less of a kiss really than a gentle touching of one cheek to another beginning with the right side just like with a handshake and then following with the left. Sometimes people will actually ask permission “on peut se faire la bise?” or “we can make the kiss?” literally translated.

The number of kisses can vary from two, which is fairly standard to three or even four, more often found in the provinces. The younger generation can throw you with only one, leaving you hanging mid air waiting for the other cheek, which is always awkward. But I suppose that’s their way of making their mark.

Occasionally, someone will start with the opposite cheek, which can also be awkward, but if you think quickly you can usually recover. There are some people who are very warm with their greeting, even pressing their lips into your cheek. And then there are others who employ their version of the air kiss, barely grazing the cheek or even carefully avoiding it altogether. I prefer the former, warmer category.

I am also fond of the good old fashioned hug when I really like someone. I have successfully imported the hug to my in-laws. Little by little, I’ve introduced it to others, but taking care to impart it after the kissing part is over to avoid any confusion. There isn’t really a word for hug here, which is interesting. “Calin” means cuddle so I’ve learned not to say “on peut se faire le calin” because that would be strange.

In any case for a culture that respects its formality, I find the kissing greeting refreshing. A handshake can bring you together, but can also leave the impression of keeping you at a distance. A kiss or brushing of the cheek is more intimate, as if to say, I trust you enough to bring you this close. And the hug, well that’s the “cerise sur le gateau” or the cherry (or icing, as we say) on the cake.

Mar 22, 2009

MacDonald’s

Well, it’s the same here as it is home, but for some reason I’ve become quite addicted to it recently. I haven’t had MacDonald’s since I was a teenager and even then I didn’t eat it with great frequency. Here I’ve had it three times in the last week!

I can’t imagine living in the culinary capital of the universe and heading for MacDonald’s whenever I have the chance, but judging from the crowds, I’m not alone. I like the Big Mac Menu – normal meaning not super-sized. Here you have a choice between fries, which I prefer and fancier potatoes, which is what my husband likes. There are the usual soft drink choices (I like Coke) and even beer. And then for dessert, I get the sundae with chocolate sauce although I’m curious to try the caramel sauce one day.

I’ve experimented with pre-paying for the sundae with my meal and then going back for it after I’ve finished. You don’t need to get back inline to do this, but since the line was intimidatingly large the last time I went, I went ahead and took everything together, but worried that my ice cream would melt before I finished.

There’s a very nice MacDonald’s near the Ikea store where we’ve already spent two Sunday afternoons. It has paintings on the wall and as my husband remarked ironically, it’s almost like a museum. Well clearly, it’s not the Louvre, but the Big Mac menu is still hard to beat. Someone told me that the revenue from France is the second highest to the US for the company. So yet another thing that France has allowed me to appreciate that I took for granted for all those years back home.

Lessive

n. – laundry
Lave-linge séchant
n. – washer dryer combo
Laundry has taken on a whole new dimension here. Back in New York, we had a laundry room with six large washers and dryers. If they were available, the whole process of washing up to six loads could be accomplished in a little over an hour. Here we have a washer/dryer combo right inside our apartment, but six loads of laundry could easily take a week.

The drying part of the washer/dryer combo is not as efficient as a separate dryer would be, but it’s a more efficient use of space. Most people have their own machines and I’ve yet to see a building with a laundry room. So it’s better than having to go to a “laverie” or laundry mat. Since we don’t normally dry absolutely everything, we can take advantage of doing several small loads rather than cramming everything in one. However the loads to dry things take absolutely forever.

I’ve lost track of the time while I’ve waited here for my sheets and one towel to finish drying, but I know I started the machine when I woke up and it’s already well into the afternoon. When we were finally able to rescue the load we put in to dry yesterday, again started in the afternoon and ending later that evening, the things poured out boiling hot, still slightly damp and more wrinkled than a litter of sharpei puppies!

The machine has a way of wrinkling even things that are permanent press. I’ve never seen anything like it. I shouldn’t complain though because many people don’t believe in dryers at all. Well, actually I can understand why! The principle is an environmental one and it’s in fact why the machines take so long. Rather than using more water and more power to wash and dry faster, the machines take their time, which is very French. There is no sense of rushing or urgency here anywhere. In restaurants, waiters will leave you at your table for hours even after you’ve paid. Shopkeepers will chit chat with customers for hours even if there others waiting. Of course when it’s your turn, they’ll spend just as much time with you. So as long as you’re patient here, things eventually get done just like my laundry. I think it’s time to go check on those hot damps wrinkly sheets.

Mar 15, 2009

Souris

n. – mouse
Sourire
n. or v. – smile
Sauter
v. – jump

The word for mouse and smile sound very similar although one rarely has anything to do with the other. I have been smiling a lot lately because I’m so much happier in our new apartment. That was until I found the mouse.

After returning ahead of my husband from running errands, I walked into the bedroom and opened the window. As I turned around, I noticed something out of the corner of my eye that didn’t quite fit – on my bed. And there it was, a little grey mouse, just sitting there quietly. It seemed unfazed by my presence. I, on the other hand, launched into full panic mode. I thought quickly as it started to move toward the pillows and grabbed an empty cup to trap it under. It worked and there I stood waiting patiently for my husband to come back and dispose of it.

He took an unusually long time and as I stood there, another mouse appeared from the living room. It started to come toward me, probably trying to rescue its friend. I screamed because that’s very helpful in these circumstances and kicked out my feet as if to say “don’t you come in here, too!” And it didn’t, but I was forced to watch it wander around the living room helpless to do anything about it. Finally I put a book on top of the cup to hold mouse #1 in place while I went out to investigate if I could trap mouse #2. The second was much faster and kept disappearing behind furniture and moving boxes.

Mercifully, my husband came home and was able to secure it with the same cup method. He then humanely took it downstairs and released it on the street. Unfortunately, the system failed with mouse #1 and after successfully guarding it for 20 minutes, when he attempted to remove it from the bed, it escaped!

Mice have a way of disappearing into thin air and I was convinced it was still hiding somewhere under the bed waiting to attack me later in my sleep. But then I saw it in the kitchen. Once again, we lay in wait trying to secure a trap for it, but once again, it escaped.

We went out to dinner with friends and regaled them with our mouse stories. Then we returned. My husband went to bed before me and as I was standing in the kitchen cleaning glasses, I saw the mouse scurry out of the bedroom and disappear into the bathroom. Defeated, I went to bed myself, exhausted enough to fall asleep without fear of the mouse running across my forehead.

At 3:30 in the morning, the light sprung on and my husband was sitting up in the bed, cup in hand. The mouse was on the floor jumping in an attempt to get into a plant we have in the corner – who knew they could jump! Apparently, it was so distracted by its goal that it didn’t notice my husband sweeping down on it from above. Finally secured, it was also taken downstairs and released to the street below.

I’m somewhat relieved and trying to convince myself that it was in fact mouse #1 and not mouse #3. Time will tell, but for the moment, the sun is out and the apartment still makes me smile.

Mar 7, 2009

Digicode

Interphone
n. – things that let people in your apartment
Most buildings here are structured relatively the same way for entering. There’s generally a large main entrance door, which requires a code. After that, you may have several other doors before you’re actually “in” the building, either ones that require more codes or keys. Once in your apartment, there is often an intercom system so if you’re somewhere that requires a key to get past the second stage, this is a way to let people in from there.

While the codes are provided for security, they’re in fact given out to almost everyone because that’s the easiest way to let them in. So I wonder sometimes how effective that really is after all. They’re supposed to change the codes once a year, but I think the one in our present building hasn’t been changed in a decade or more. I have to think about it for a moment to remember the numbers when giving the code to someone else, but it’s easy to remember when I enter it myself since it makes the sign of a cross.

We have an intercom now, but not at the new place so once we’ve given out all the codes, the only warning we’ll have that someone’s arrived is when they knock on the door. I like having an intercom because it gives you that two minute warning that’s often needed. I’m rarely just standing in front of the door ready to greet guests, but usually running around doing something else. We have two codes to remember that are equally random so I’m going to have to carry them with me everywhere I go, again not the best security system, but it’s not as if we’re moving to an unsafe neighborhood.

This is good thing because lighting in buildings is not automatic as it is in the US. It’s great on one hand because it saves energy. I have come to the conclusion that what’s saved in lighting in the residential buildings is applied to lighting up the spectacular monuments around the city and especially the lovely hourly twinkling of lights around the top of the Eiffel Tower every night.

Sometimes, the hallways lights will go on automatically, which is nice, but you can’t always count on that so it’s good to be prepared to look for the light switch as soon as possible upon entering so you don’t get caught in the dark. The lights will go off automatically so again, you must be sure to look for additional switches as you make your way toward the elevators or front doors because if you dawdle you could get stuck.

This is particularly dangerous if you’ve chosen to take the stairs as we often do here on the way down to save the trouble of waiting for an ever so slow lift. There is more room on the stairs as many elevators here are barely small enough to fit one person let alone two or more. I hope we don’t have to take the stairs too much at our new place since we’ll be on the 7th floor. The lift seems to work well and while not so large, it has a gate allowing you to see out which helps with the feeling of claustrophobia.

So once we get past the lights and the lift, we can settle in once more to our new home. And for family and friends who want to visit, we’ll be sure to give out the codes.

Mar 6, 2009

Glaçons

n. – ice cubes
Glace
n. – ice cream
Verre
n. – glass
Vert
adj. - green
I sometimes confuse the first two words and get strange looks when ordering a cocktail with ice cream in it! I get strange looks even if I get it right because it’s not really a cocktail culture here. Don’t get me wrong, the French enjoy their “apero,” but it’s usually something along the lines of a kir or a vin cuit (sweet wine) served in a small delicate glass.

Stronger drinks like Ricard or Pastis, both licorice based, are more for the boys (at 45% proof, they’re served with water). Whisky is also acceptable for a man and is acceptable to be served neat, but vodka has a very strange place in the bar menu as something only to be mixed with something else.

I like vodka. My favorite drink is a dry vodka martini up with a twist. They don’t make those here. I’ve learned not to ask for them because what I end up with is an Italian brand of vermouth that’s quite sweet and has nothing to do with vodka. It comes in either a pale yellowish color or red. Of course with the red one, I knew something was wrong before even tasting it.

So I’ve learned to ask for vodka over ice with a twist. After the confused look, it’s brought to me with sometimes a giant wedge of lemon, sometimes lime and always with a spoon in it like they bring with your cokes. I’ve never understood the spoon in the drink. Why would you want to stir a soft drink? Nobody has ever been able to explain it to me. It’s just the way it is.

Cutlery is used more often than we might be used to. For example most people will use their forks and knives when eating pizza, hamburgers and even fries. I use my hands for all of the above and now realize I must look quite savage when doing so.

Straws aren’t quite as popular here and getting back to ice, that’s not either. In both the places we’ve lived in so far, there have been no ice trays in the freezer. I’m sure they exist, but we’ve discovered another ice making method. They’re little quilted plastic bags that you fill up with water then turn upside down which creates a seal before popping them in the freezer.

I’ve gotten quite used to them actually although they do make your fingers quite cold as you wrestle with the plastic to get the ice cubes out. They’re not very green either given that they’re not reusable at all. So now that we have to buy a fridge since our new apartment doesn’t have one, I think we’ll splurge on some ice trays, too.

Mar 4, 2009

Café gourmand

n. – coffee that comes with a small sampling of desserts
Ca n’a rien a voire
Expression – it has nothing to do with it
Café gourmand is one of the best things ever. You can find it in most nice restaurants and for the price of a regular dessert, you can have your coffee accompanied by an assortment of smaller sized portions of whatever the chef chooses for you. It could be a mini-chocolate mousse and a mini crème brulée or a mini panna cota and a mini tiramisu or some small cookies with marron glace (crystallized chestnuts). Delicious!

Not long ago, we were out with friends at a nice restaurant and we all decided to go with the prix fixe. After ordering, the waitress came back to tell us they were out of one of our choices for the main course, which they had substituted for something else. No problem. Then after ordering the wine, we were told they were out of that bottle so we chose something else, no problem again.

When it was time for dessert, I asked if it might be possible to substitute the café gourmand for one of the prix fixe choices to which I was told “ca n’a rien a voire!” or “it’s not at all the same thing!” Not wanting to put up a fuss, I demurred.

Minutes later, the waitress returned again to tell us that one of the dessert choices was going to be substituted as well. We all looked at her incredulously at this point - surely after gamely accepting all the substitutions, the chef could be willing to work with us on the café gourmand? Message received and understood and the café gourmand was mine!

Mar 1, 2009

Serveur

n. – waiter
Vendeur
n. – vendor or shopkeeper
Service in France can be different from what we’re used to in the US. The culture here, as I’ve mentioned before, is very formal. If you call the phone company or your bank representative, you are always addressed as Monsieur or Madame and are expected to respond in the same way. In small stores, you are expected to say hello upon entering and thank you and goodbye upon exiting. If you add the Monsieur or Madame each time, as well, that’s even better.

So most of the time, there is a mutual respect between client and commerce owner – a feeling of “egalité” or equality going back to the second creed of the famous motto. The client here is not necessarily king and we know what happened to the last one here, but rather a partner in a transaction that is mutually beneficial.

It’s an ideal state of balance really, except for when something goes wrong. That is when I actually miss being the king. The formality of the French can sometimes disguise the underlying Latin temperament – at times simply brooding and at others outright volatile. Recently, in confronting someone over what was a legitimate complaint, I was met not with an apology, but rather a tirade as to why I was in fact wrong and they were in fact right.

Sometimes, you can inspire wrath by simply asking an innocent question as I did not long ago when looking at a bedside table that was on sale. I asked the shopkeeper if there were any more to which, after dramatically rolling his eyes, he responded exasperatedly that it was the last one. This type of reaction can go either way when asking in restaurants if they accept credit cards. The response can either be an exasperated “du tout” – short for “pas du tout” or not at all (you idiot), or it can be an equally exasperated “bien sur” or of course we do (you idiot).

Either way you’re the idiot for asking and that’s where the game is designed to keep you on your toes. However, the Monsieur or Madame comes in handy if you feel a confrontation coming on. They act as neutralizers and serve as reminders that we’re all equal and as such should treat each other with equal respect, which is what ultimately results in the final creed of the motto which is “fraternité.” Even as an only child, I know that a little brotherhood can go a long way.

Liberté

n. – liberty or freedom
Egalité
n. – equality
Fraternité
n. – fraternity or botherhood
Publicité
n. – advertising
The first three words make up the motto of French ideology. Ever since storming the Bastille, the French have held the principal of freedom high on their list of fundamental rights.

This resistance to being oppressed in any way has carried over to their reluctance in embracing advertising. As someone who has spent several years working in international print advertising, I learned a great deal about the restrictions pertaining to ad placements in France. There are issues ranging from comparison advertising to claims that are unquantifiable.

Examples of the former would be an ad that states a product is better than another product, which is the basis of many campaigns in the US. Here that would be “interdit” or forbidden. An unquantifiable claim would be anything you describe as a miracle product because clearly miracles are very hard to prove.

The government has recently limited advertising on public television and rather is seeking to increase the taxes paid by the public for said programming as a way to underwrite the costs. Many people who enjoy the public programming with its rich menu of arts and culture have no problem with this. However, those who aren’t fans don’t care if there are less ads and don’t want to have to pay more money to support something they don’t watch in the first place.

Unless you have a digital system whereby you have more control over your television, less advertising can actually become a hindrance. I remember the days before DVR’s when ads would release you to use the restroom, clean the dishes, call someone quickly or do whatever it was you needed to do within the time that slight break would allow. The ads in a way were what made watching television at home less restrictive than going to the movies where you would miss something if you had to get up at any time.

Of course not watching the ads defeats the purpose just as well as not having them at all. And as advertisers have caught on to our ability to block their messages, their methods have become more and more pervasive. If you want to watch television live, the only way to avoid the commercials is the old fashioned way of leaving the room when they come on. In movie theaters, the only solution is to wait until the last minute before the previews starts at which point all the good seats have been taken. In print, they are interspersed between the pages of the articles you read. Online, they’re constantly popping up as you surf the web or try to watch videos. And outdoor, they can be as tall as skyscrapers making them impossible to ignore.

This last form of advertising has come under attack here recently by groups of people whose goal is not only to destroy the ads, but to get arrested while doing it. I’ve seen them in the metro stations ripping the ads from the walls and I’ve also seen the graffiti left behind as they make their point against whatever message the advertiser is trying to make. It’s not so much against the specific product itself as it is against the fact that the message is so blatant and hard to avoid. In other words, advertising infringes upon personal freedom.

It’s an interesting argument because one could counter that the exposure to so many products can in fact help people to freely choose the one that’s right for them. Sounds good in theory, but it’s actually that very plethora of products on the market that is what’s overwhelming.

So maybe it’s not so bad after all if you can accept when someone tells you their product is better than the rest since it’s a miracle – because if you can believe in miracles, you’re already much better off.

WC séparés

real estate selling point. – separate toilet or water closet
Most of the apartments we’ve looked at have the toilet separated from the bathroom itself. While I understand the principal of this – keeping the toilet away from the area in which you bathe and clean yourself – I prefer to have everything together. This is especially true if the toilet is located all by itself in a room without even a sink since that defeats the whole purpose of cleanliness. After all, you have to touch the door to get out and touch another door to get in to the bathroom before you can wash your hands.

There’s something very isolating to me about having the toilet in a separate room. It’s as if I was being sent there as a punishment. The name WC or water closet is quite fitting because in most cases, it does feel like being locked in a small closet. At best, it feels more commercial than residential since most public restrooms have stalls and no access to the sink or the mirror until you’ve unlocked yourself out of them.

As for public restrooms here, I have just one question – where have all the toilet seats gone? While I’ve mentioned previously that I’m not paranoid about toilet seat germs and am perhaps too lazy to attempt to hover rather than sit, even that’s not possible when there is no actual seat. I suppose in a way, this is the reason for eliminating them altogether. No seats – no germs.

So the bathroom is a place where one often has to make compromises. While home toilets will come with seats, there’s still the question of where they’ll be located and what will accompany them. At the very least, perhaps a sink or at most a shower, tub and maybe even bidet. I suppose that would be the bathroom equivalent of the cuisine Américaine.

Arrondissement

n. – district
Paris, or the department zip code that begins with 75, is made up of 20 districts. Starting with the number 1 which is in the center of Paris near the Louvre, the districts circle around themselves in the pattern of a snail shell. So you can have the 8th arrondissement just next to part of the 16th and so on.

Each zip code ends with the number of the district so if you live in the 1st, your zip code would be 75001. There is an exception to that rule in the 16th, which because of its large size is divided into two zip codes, 75016 and 75116. I know this because we are now living in the one that ends in 116.

As with any city, areas are labeled by their residents and most people will try to sell you on the area they live in. I suppose this is normal because most people, unlike us at the moment, like where they live. Different areas have their own reputations, which like most stereotypes, are universally recognized.

The four most expensive areas are the 6th, 7th, pockets of the 4th (Isle St. Louis and the Marais) and pockets of the 16th. Ironically all of these areas are where we have ended up in one sense or another.

Our favorite hotel is located in the 6th, not far from the Montparnasse train station and surrounded by great shops and restaurants. We started our adventure here in the heart of Isle St. Louis, which is one of the oldest parts of Paris and still feels like it in its village like spirit. The apartment we just moved to is in the northern 16th near Place Victor Hugo, home of old money and foreign embassies. And the apartment I think we’ll be leaving it for is in the 7th, a lively area close to the Eiffel Tower that attracts a young, wealthy international crowd.

Not only are people very loyal to their areas, but there are very specific characteristics that will separate one part of an area from another. For example within the 16th, the northern 16th seems more acceptable. While chatting with a shopkeeper and resident of Isle St. Louis and explaining that we were moving to the 16th, she sniffed – “ca n’a rien a voire” meaning it’s nothing like here. I instinctively defended it by explaining it was the northern 16th which settled her somewhat.

Despite the fact that it’s located in the more favorable northern 16th, even the grand Avenue Foch gets dissected between the northern side of the avenue itself, which suffers from lack of sun (when there’s any to be had) and the southern side. So often it’s not enough to just tell people where you live, but rather specify the exact address or landmark that better pinpoints the location.

We have probably suffered from the fact that we didn’t really mind where we ended up as long as the apartment itself was comfortable. We cast our net too wide which resulted in collecting too much debris rather than sitting patiently in one spot and waiting for the best possible catch to come along. As such, we lost time that could have been spent settling in, but on the other hand, we gained a deeper understanding of the city and therefore will have a better appreciation for the place we will finally call home.